Big * Middle * Little

Big * Middle * Little
Just a Blog about my boys, helmets, food and family....

Friday, August 31, 2012


I've been trying to get on the computer to blog all week but I just can't seem to find the time.  Ahhh!!
I have so much to say and write about all these thoughts are getting jumbled in my head.  But for now I need to go pack and get ready for a busy labor day weekend that involves driving to St. George.
Happy Labor day all!!  This blog is going to be a bigger priority next week, I promise.

Monday, August 20, 2012


I hate my legs... I really do.
My legs and I have never really gotten along all that well.
I was blessed with really thick, dark hair.  Which is great for my head, eyebrows and eyelashes. However it has caused much pain and suffering for my legs, and grief for me.

Currently I am suffering from nasty in-grown hairs right below my knees, and
some sort of allergic reaction all over.

While in high school I NEVER wore shorts or Capri's because I was so
embarrassed about the sad condition my legs were in.
(Personally I think Capri's are ugly, they seem old lady to me.  I still wear them out of comfort and that is just personal opinion, not everyone looks old lady in them and if you like them just ignore this comment and think mean things about be behind my back :)  )

Here is a collage of what my nasty legs looked like this morning.
I'd love to get laser hair removal.

If anyone has ANY tips for me please share, this has seriously been an on going struggle for me since about 14 years old.
I can remember wearing only jeans in high school.  Other than dance classes I can't think of a time from ages 14-20 that I ever wore shorts, then I just stopped caring how bad it looked.

Now that I'm older I just pretend they look fine, the above picture was taken 8 hours after shaving with out using any lotions or oils. 
I do shave with a sensitive skin shave gel and an expensive 5 blade razor, because any cheap, less blade type literally hacks my legs.

I have horror stories of shaving and going up my leg and getting skin caught in the razor and having giant gouges on my legs and finding skin in my razor.

Too much info?  Well I need help.
Seriously, I have tired so many tips and I am still having the same struggle.

All my beauty magazines have failed me much like waxing has
(I always seem to be allergic to something in the wax that causes more red bumps and requires calamine lotion which then makes me wear pants yet again making the waxing completely pointless, UGH!!)

Tips? please share.

Friday, August 17, 2012

A moment of silence please

Today I'd like to take a moment of silence and mourning for my life as we know it...
See today, we are getting cable.
I'm not thrilled about it.
I already spend t.v. time watching kid shows and when Scott is home it's some sort of sport or game show.
Now we will have ESPN and more kid show options.  I may never see my guys again.
We're getting a killer deal on cable by switching, they offered us a college student discount that includes our land phone line, high speed Internet, and... cable all for the same price we were paying for just Internet and phone. 
So, the deal is done and we are a cable family.
Words of encouragement please....

Thursday, August 16, 2012


Yesterday was a rough day.  I don't want to say bad because nothing bad happened, it was just a rough day. 
Rivers is entering his "terrible two's" which seems to mean stubborn power struggle with a 21 month old who likes to pick his nose.
It sucks!
Yesterday took the cake.  I had a pretty good plan for my day and I hate when things get off schedule.  It started when Rivers wouldn't eat his breakfast.  That soon escalated into his first major tantrum. From there it got messy with lots of tears, snot and the ugly shaky cry that happens.  He also banged his head pretty hard against the table.  He wouldn't take a nap, and combined with his stubbornness about not eating breakfast I was done.  I left him to "cry it out" in the safety of his crib with a sippy cup of juice.  He eventually fell asleep. 
After naps my plan was this.
Costco, Lunch, Smith's, Park, dinner, Mutual, bedtime.  My mutual sitter is in Lake Powell so Rivers was going to go to Scouts with Scott, Keeping him up late, but sometimes that's just how we roll.
Well while preparing to go to Costco, I realized Scott had my debit card with our food money on it, he was at the library looking for a scout book and realized he didn't have his library card and needed me to bring it to him, which I needed my card from him so we decided to go to the store together.  In my haste to get to Scott I forgot my coupons, so while I shopped with Rivers Scott ran home to get them.  While that was happening the mean (not really) people at Smith's have decided to move around the whole store and I couldn't find anything, and Rivers was SHOUTING the whole time through to store, very loudly. 
Now that I was at least a good hour off schedule and  stressed I decided now was a good time to go to Costco.  What is wrong with me?  Luckily they had a few samples for Rivers since he missed lunch (mother of the year!) and he continued to shout through out Costco too.  I finally got home with a yelling one year old, starving parents and a disaster of a house with an hour for dinner before baths and mutual.  So we had Papa Murphy's pizza for dinner, what a time saver.
Now is the best part of the day.  We got a call the Scott's younger brother Kyle (finally) got his mission call!!!
Scott and I both shortened our Mutual activities and headed to Sojo to be there when Kyle opened his call!
I love missionaries, and missionary work.  I have been so excited for Kyle to get his call.
He's going to Moscow Russia by-the-way and leaves January 2!!!!!!
I was grateful for two thing's yesterday, Mutual because I love my calling, and Mission calls because I do.
The Lord is great people, I ended my day on a happy note by eating otter pops remembering how great it was being a missionary.
Much better than a temper tantrum.

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Hair cut!

I (yes I, Mystique Hulse Shepherd) with assistants from Scott Shepherd, gave Rivers his second hair cut.  It turned out cute, and saved me money.  Now Rivers walks around the house saying "hair all gone"  He looks so handsome.  Don't look too closely, this was my first hair cut  ever, well with scissors anyway

Let's be honest, he needed a hair cut....

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Herriman Tri.

I'm so proud of my Scotty!  On Saturday he finished the Herriman Triathalon!  He's been training for some time now and he did great! Finishing in roughly 2 hours (give or take, I'm still confused on how they calculated transition times).  Scott really enjoys these things and I'm so happy for him.  The Herriman tri is really nice and calm, it's held in a very farm friendly community and I wouldn't mind living there if it would stop catching on fire so much.  I missed his swim (sad) but Rivers and I were able to get there for his bike/run transition.  He did awesome and I'm so so so proud of him

getting ready to run

Rivers LOVED cheering for the runners! He was also trying really hard to get on to the roped off place, finally he settled for just wearing the rope

 Scott's dad also ran the tri, and finished seriously one minute before Scott.  Here he is about to cross the finish line (Go Grandpa Go!!)
Look at this awesome live action shot, Go Scott Go!!

There he is crossing the finish line!!!
 Also back in June most of Scott's family ran the Utah Valley Marathon.  Well, Ok, Nathan ran the marathon part.  Christy, Matt and Mark ran the half marathon and Scott, Rivers, Jessica and I ran the 10K.  This was my first race and may very well be my last.  Sorry not my thing, but it was fun to be part of the awesomness that was the after race fun, and it was fun to do it with so much support!
Jessica, Nathan, Mark, Rivers, Me, Christy (who is cute preggers with Lively baby boy), and Matt

Monday, August 13, 2012


So this post is about super awesome garden, but as I write this I'm eating otter pops.  They were not grown in my garden and have little to no nutritional value, but I'm going to try to get past that to tell you how awesome having a garden is. 
So many people don't know this, largely because I don't broadcast it, but I was a vegetarian for about 10 years.  I love fruits and veggies! I really do.  I also love candy, but we can discuss that later. 
Produce can be expensive, so this year Scott and I, along with my mom, decided to grow a "victory garden".
It's been a lot of work, but also a lot of fun. 
We planted tomatoes, broccoli, cucumbers, peppers, jalapenos, lettuce, carrots, black beans, and beets.  Early on in our garden the stupid birds can and ate the carrot, lettuce and beet seeds and sadly they didn't leave anything but one carrot. 
fresh picked!

and so yummy

just picked cucumbers, but not the first or the last!  We've had millions of them

My blog would not be complete without a picture of my child, and some tomato plants, they are taller than him.
Luckily, however, we still had lots of other plants that grew.  It has been fun watching and enjoying our garden and eating our harvests.  Our cucumber plants have gone crazy and some of the tomato plants are as tall as me!!
The tomatoes still aren't ready to be picked, we've only had a few cherry and grape tomatoes that have gotten ripe, but we will have 2308473633.9 tomatoes when the ripen.  Then I get to go on to the fun bottling and canning phase of gardening (sarcastic yay).
This garden is at my parents house, we also had a small garden here at our apartment that has reached it's peak and is over for the season.  In that garden we planted Peas, Carrots, Beets, and Onions and it only produced beets and peas that were pretty much amazing. 
I was surprised at how much I enjoyed gardening. I'm already planning for next year!!

Tuesday, August 7, 2012


Oh nap time.  Beautiful, calm, alone nap time.  My time to get ready and pretend to be a girl instead of just a dumpy mom.  I don't mind being a dumpy mom, it's far more comfortable then my old wardrobe.  My feet are happier anyway.  My wardrobe isn't the point of this e-mail, as the heading would state. 
I can't cook.
Well I'm learning to cook, it's a learning process. 
I can bake, Oh how I love to bake. The warm, sugary, sometimes gooey awesomeness. 
Sadly my family can not thrive on cookies and brownies like I can.  Well Rivers could but Scott can't, and I'm sure it's not good for Rivers to eat as much sugar as I do.
My husband is a chef, and I think that is why we haven't died yet. When I was growing up I took no interest in cooking.  In fact I can remember endless conversations with my mother about my lack of culinary skill. In typical Mormon mom fashion she would tell me that I was never going to "find" a husband if I can't cook.  My counter argument was always that I was planning on marrying a man who could cook, that will show you!  And I did! But alas, he works a lot, and goes to school full time (starting again August 20) and since I'm a non contributing zero now, the cooking falls on me. 
So every day I wake up, assets what food we have on hand, and plan out the days meals.  When I'm really on top of things I plan for the whole week, but I'm a fly by the seat of my pants kinds gal.
Besides all Rivers wants to eat is chicken nuggets, and sugar.
So since I don't want him to be 20737423 lbs. one day I must cook better food for him.
Some times I totally miss.  I made this Pasta once that was so terrible, Rivers took one bite and cried the rest of dinner until I threw it out and made chicken nuggets.
Some days I'm right on! Bulls eye! This is one of them.
I got this recipe from my awesome neighbor and friend Coral, who can cook and does eat healthy.  Plus I usually have left overs to feed Rivers the next morning. Which I like because it's fast.
So with out further ado, My awesome Whole Wheat Nutmeg pancakes!

Dry Ingredients:
1 1/2 cup flour (I use whole wheat flour, but white works and tastes good too)
3 Tb sugar
1 Tb baking Powder (not to be confused with baking soda)
1/4 tsp salt
1/8 tsp nutmeg

Wet Ingredients:
3 Tb butter, melted
2 large eggs
1 1/4 cups milk
1/2 tsp vanilla

Mix dry ingredients, mix wet ingredients, mix together. Cook in skillet over medium heat.

I always burn the first one trying to get the temperature right.  I serve them with sugar free apple sauce and Rivers LOVES them!
This way I feel better when he eats M&M's for lunch.

Well nap time is about to end and I should do other things, you know "mom things"
Enjoy my yummy pancake recipe :)

Thursday, August 2, 2012


I met Rivers on October 24, 2010.  He quickly became my best friend. It's true. I'm head over heels for this little man.  I'm pretty sure I've met him before, eternally speaking.

Look at that squishy face.

My favorite picture taken the day he was born

He stole Grandma's hat during the Bountiful Parade. He kept saying "I funny"

21 Months after that first picture and he's so big and smart and fun and amazing.  I love him!
To this day I can't believe Rivers is mine.
Rivers will always have a very special, sacred place in my heart.  I'm sure my other children will as well, but since I only have him to consider right now I feel I can say that. 

I wasn't one of those girls who wanted to grow up and be a "mommy", I played with dolls but I like to dress them and do their hair.  I grew up reading beauty magazines and playing with make-up. I wanted to be a model or a fashion magazine editor, or even just reporter.

Babies never really fit into the deal.  I loved clothes and shoes and make up and stores and glamor.  I never had a maternal drive like most girls I knew.  I was never bothered by this.  I figured I had just found my notch in life.  I was voted best dressed in High School, I always had good looking hair and the best hair cuts.  Those were just the things that interested me.

Around 20 years old I felt the strong desire to serve a mission.  So I did.  It was awesome.  I loved being a missionary and I really did feel I helped those who I met in NY.  Being in NY was great.  I was in upstate NY which is different than the city of NY, but there was still an amazing sense of fashion and design that I loved.  I was able to spend some time in the city later on, which I fell in love with. I'd serve a mission again, anywhere, in a heart beat.

I've also always been very nomadic.  My parents hated this.  I chose not to get a "higher education" because I loved having freedom. Leaving when I want, coming back when I felt the fancy. I had plans to be famous so travel was a need.

Scott and Rivers never really fit into my life.

Shortly after returning from serving a mission in May of 2003 I had a bit of an unusual experience.

This is where my story gets a bit sacred, ok a lot sacred.  I've never really discussed this with anyone other than Scott, and I hold this near and dear to my heart.  Also, this isn't church doctrine or anything so please don't make me out to be anything special.  This is just what I experienced and what I felt. 

One day I woke up with the strong desire to have a baby. I was 23 and had only returned home from serving and LDS mission a few weeks earlier.  I think I was still on that Missionary spiritual high.  I had written a group e-mail to some friends both in NY and UT expressing these feelings stating that maybe it was time for me to "settle down" and have babies.  I was a bit lost at this time of my life.  While I was a missionary I felt the whole world had changed.  Everyone had cell phone and was watching reality television.  The world was turning "trashy" I felt. I had some decisions to make in my life.  My boyfriend before my mission wasn't interested anymore, I wasn't in school, I had no job, I was scared. Then to top it all off I was feeling this strong need to have a baby that was getting stronger with each passing day.

A few ideas I received from some friends were that maybe I was about to meet my "baby daddy", or maybe I was going to meet someone who had kids and was divorced, or maybe I was going to adopt older kids who were being born then.  I thought these were all good possibilities and tried to put these feelings on the back burner.

They got stronger.  It was becoming nagging.  "Have a baby, have a baby, have a baby" was in my mind ALL the time.  I hated it.  Kids were gross, they leaked from every hole on their bodies. They were messy and noisy. But there it was "have a baby, have a baby, have a baby."

One day I was on the freeway driving to my apartment in Salt Lake that I shared with some friends and the thought was clear. It shouted at me "Mommy! I want a body!" WTH. I had to get off the freeway and cry.  This nagging spirit was, what I felt, my unborn baby calling out to me from the spirit world. How was I supposed to have a baby?  I wasn't dating anyone seriously, I was working a lot, No real potential for a father in sight and I wanted to do this the way the Lord commanded.  So through my tears I stated "If you want a body you had better help me find your daddy."

A few weeks later I met Scott.  When I met him I knew he was the man I was going to marry.  I even said that to some friends and joked about how weird and crazy I sounded.  Who just meets someone and thinks "Oh, there's my husband."  Besides Scott was dating someone else.  So I did what any girl would do.  I made myself available to him.  It worked and before I knew it Scott and I were talking marriage and family.  I could feel that little spirit bursting!  Finally his mommy and daddy were going to make his wishes and wants come true. 

I wanted babies almost immediately after I was married, but Scott wanted to wait.  We compromised and waited a year.  I hated being pregnant, it was awful, but I always knew who was inside of me.  I could feel his spirit and knew that he was a Boy, my boy, my nagging little spirit I knew from the pre-existence. 

When he was born I was thrilled, and sad.  That spirit that had been so close to me for so long was gone, well not gone, but not as present in my life.  Rivers hated being a newborn.  He cried a lot.  He hated his new little incapable body.  I missed the joy his spirit was being so close to mine. 

Now that he's getting bigger, and talking a ton, and growing and doing the things he has always wanted to do I notice how familiar he is to me, because I have always known him.  He was and still is that sweet spirit that I used to talk to and consult all my decisions with.  He's my unintentional soul mate.  I often feel like I've known him forever.  He's my world.  He helped me find Scott, he taught me to be a mom.  How to learn to wear old clothes, how to get ready in 2 minutes, and forces me to learn to cook.  He plays with me, loves me, teaches me, forces me to be better, and makes me happy.  All things he's done from the moment I first felt that special little spirit begging me for a body. 

I cherish everyday I have with him.

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Why a change? Why now?

I've gotten this question from a few people, namely family since most of you are family or close to it.
The reason is simple. Everything changes and you can either go with the change or complain about it. I chose to go with it. Over the last year my life has felt very new, very different.  I've liked it, but I could feel change happening, and I'm talking bigger than when facebook makes changes.
Last August my awesome husband quit his job to go back to school full time.  This change made a difference in our roles at home.  I used to work during the day and he worked nights and our beautiful son was being watched for a few hours a day by others (family who loved him, but still not me or Scott). I didn't like this. When school started I was able to work night so Scott could take classes during the day and we were able to take care of our child independently.  At first I loved being home with him during the day and working at night to help take care of my family.  I was making more money and Scott was really happy and so was Rivers.  I was exhausted.  Kids some how syphon any and all energy out of a normal person.  I would get up around 7 with an infant/toddler, take care of him, make Scott a lunch, clean the house and keep up the laundry and other house chores, Work for 5-8 hours (waitress remember, crazy hours), come home, clean up dinner, decompress, shower then go to bed.  I was averaging about 5-6 hours of sleep a night, but I was making it work and thought I was happy.  Only I wasn't.  At first I blamed it on seasonal depression, but really I was burning both ends of the candle and slaving away at a job that was convenient, but not great.  Don't get me wrong I love being a waitress, and I'm pretty good at it too.
At some point however things started slipping.  Scott had finals coming up and I was busy with my Young Women's calling.  I began to give up the fight.  I got a complaint at work from a costumer.  These are common, people have crazy expectations and when something doesn't work as planned they take it out of the low man, well for me, I was that low man.  I tried to make things right with the guest but in the end the company decided to let me go.  I was panicked.  What was I to do with a now one year old, a husband out of school for the summer who was working for his dad, no job skills except hospitality which was now tarnished, and a whole summer of bills still needing to be attended to? I prayed, and I prayed and I prayed.  I kept thinking "the Lord will work this out after I do all I can do." I looked for other serving jobs but I wanted something very specific.  No Sundays, and I needed Wednesdays off for Mutual.  Also I'd rather not serve liquor, but I was willing to let that one slide if I could find something that met the first two, since I don't drink those became the important ones. Nothing really seemed promising.  I had one interview that was more of "Well we think you're great, but we actually just filled the spot we had open. But we will keep you in mind next time and give you a call since you're so great for this".  After some talk with Scott we decided to take it to the Lord and see this as a sign to live the way our parents and grandparents lived. Poor.  Dirt poor to be exact.  We had been smart and paid off our car with our tax return, paid off our credit card, and put the rest in savings.  This has been how we've paid our bills (fallowing the counsel of church leaders really pays off) We see no movies, don't go out to eat, stick to a menu of sorts (some weeks thing fall apart) and been very careful about our money.  With Scott working for his dad we have been able so pay our bills, fulfill our calling in the YM and YW (did I mention that while all this was going on Scott got called to the YM's presidency and to be the Scout master? He did and we got more busy.), and still have one super smart, happy son. 
I want to mention here that my depression seems to have gone away as well.  I think I was just over whelmed and unhappy. Life improved and I realized how unhappy I was at my job, and that I had been for some time now.  They treated me very poorly and I put up with it for so long. I'd been working at the same place for five and a half years! I'd been there through 3 lead MOD's, 2 executive chef's, 4 sous chefs and at least 30-40 different servers.  Not to mention a few VIP changes in the company.  I finally feel like myself for the first time since High school.  I have time now to finish my sewing classes, blog better (now that I want to), learn to cook healthy meals, play games with the neighbors, make it to friends parties and functions, and be the wife and mother I've wanted to be as well as the YW leader I know I can me. 
Blessing in disguise.
Well I hear that nap time is over. Please stay tuned as I embrace the workings of becoming a better wife a mother and doing the domestic thing